The way your culture, your parents, and other influences in your life set expectations for how a romantic partner “should’ be, is actually hurting your relationship rather than helping it.
At the end of the day, nobody knows what is best for you better than you do. Yet most of us enter adulthood with a plethora of instilled subconscious beliefs around what our ideal partner “should” be like.
There are a wide range of variables involved when it comes to how relational expectations, from both society and our families, affect us. Whether it be based upon socio-economic status, religion, race, or generational trauma, your upbringing plays a major role in the type of partner you think you want and actually attract.
How exactly is this hurting your relationship?
Well, there are quite a few reasons. We spend the first 18 or so years of life under the care of our parents. These are people who have their own wounds, traumas, and life experiences that shape them into who they are as humans and as parents.
When emotional traumas are not healed, scientific research has proven it can be passed down from generation to generation. This means that our parents’ traumas and beliefs around relationships were tainted by their own generational pain.
What they believe is best for you may carry residue of a trauma, pain, or belief that has not been healed and is therefore passed down through your DNA, and is buried in. your cells. So even when parents, relatives, or society at large truly believes they have their children’s best interest in mind, there may be an underlying fear or subconscious memory keeping them blocked in a certain belief system caused by their trauma.
Culturally, a similar thing happens. Within each culture lies centuries of collective generational pain. Old belief systems based on separation, disconnect, wars and distrust linger in most societies today. These beliefs get instilled onto the collective with ideas of moral rightness vs. wrongness.
Each and every one of these outdated beliefs plays a role in our subconscious mind, leading us to make choices based on beliefs that were never ours to begin with.
When it comes to relationships, you’ll likely continue the pattern of attracting a person that follows the outdated subconscious beliefs and the cultural/parental conditioning they were fed for much of their life.
The point is that most individuals are born with a heavy load of baggage that has entirely nothing to do with them. This is called generational trauma. It is the trauma that has been passed down from one generation to the next, your parents, and their parents, and so on. This genetic pain might hold old fear-based stories, beliefs, and ideas about life that may have never resonated with you had they not been placed upon you from an early age, spoken or genetically. The science that has determined this is called epigenetics.
As adults when we become aware of this, it is our responsibility to do what we can to break free from this generational pain. If we don’t we are simply adding to the suffering in our own lives as well as future generations.
How do you break free from generational trauma?
ingrained beliefs can be hard to change. The beliefs your grandparents, and previous generations had about love and relationships directly impacted your parents, and they knowingly or unknowingly through genetics passed these patterns to you which became the way you relate romantically.
Without these patterns being broken, these beliefs will continue to impact generations to come.
This means solely you are responsible for clearing this genetic pain from your body, at the source, within your cells.
One suggestion of a holistic complementary technique that has been proven to be rapidly effective is SOS Method. It’s is an evidence-based method that has helped countless thousands worldwide to overcome negative behavior often caused by generational trauma, and find greater happiness, health, and empowerment. SOS Method combines Discovery programs, Dynamic Meditations, and Mind Fitness Tools that can be practiced with a therapist, coach or solo.
It has helped countless thousands of people worldwide to change negative mindsets, and step into new behavior patterns that resonate the kind of relationship you dream of.
SOS Method is a great way to explore the science of epigenetics and how to transform its effects now for future generations. You learn to create a life and relationships you love by releasing generational pain, blame and shame while embracing healing and freedom even in as little time as 5 minutes a day.
The SOS Method program ’New Discoveries to Be Free’ in the Love & Relationships category will support you in clearing unresolved stress and trauma in your cells, revitalizing your spirit, and embracing true freedom.
This 3-day program simply and yet powerfully effective techniques is your ticket to liberation from both cultural and parental expectations around relationships.